I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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