I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
as a side note pls kill me
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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