This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
