party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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