just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
