I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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