"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
its not stalking. its research.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
