As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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