It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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