Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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