She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
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Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
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We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.