low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
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I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
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I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize