Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize