Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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