Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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