12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine