so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
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He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
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Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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