the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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