i don't like sucking hair
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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