I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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