Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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