you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Brb crying the tears of my youth
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..