Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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