Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
