I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize