id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize