More tranny stories later!
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
