Do you still have your period?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
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when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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