good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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