I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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