Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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