i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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