it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
