Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
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Liz is crying about burritos again.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
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Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.