yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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