just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I think people are normalizing furries
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
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