so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think people are normalizing furries
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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