I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize
