You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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