Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
