Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
