Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
We got so high we made milksteak
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.