Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
