Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
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It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
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White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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