im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize