I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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