i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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