i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
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