I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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