You're my little dorito
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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